windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
windmill - the planning stopped
remind me on the 23rd to load this on youtube
Saturday, April 17, 2010
push in, push in
I don't really get why people think saying
"Well... this is awkward."
makes it even more awkward. I always thought saying it would result in
"Haha, yeah."
which then encourages me to talk more, which I end up doing.
same
54. I was standing in the cat food aisle again today, this time with a $Twenty note, but only aimed on spending under $Fifteen. After trying to count it up in my head, I calculated that I had spent $12 roughly, so I took it to the counter, who then, after scanning all my food, informed me that it cost $9.96. WHAT?
Also, did my use of $Twenty and $Fifteen confuse you? Yeah, same.
8.
Sometimes I get really depressed, as if my brain has run out of endorphins, or that the side effect of too much caffeine kicks in. Its not that something terrible happens within the last 24 hours, more so because I tend to start reflecting upon myself and my faults, and I start to compare where I'm at to where I'd like to be or where I should be.
9. I really don't like wasting time. As in, I'm the sort of person who would get to school at 7:40ish ( year 9 ) just because I found out that I wouldn't be wasting so much time in between busses and trains waiting for them. I realised that, if I caught an earlier bus, it would get me to the station where there is a train waiting right there, and so I would reduce travel time from 50minutes to about 30. Yeah, I don't like wasting time. I'll pretty much always try to keep myself busy. Even if I already am. ( I'm weird =D )
9. I really don't like wasting time. As in, I'm the sort of person who would get to school at 7:40ish ( year 9 ) just because I found out that I wouldn't be wasting so much time in between busses and trains waiting for them. I realised that, if I caught an earlier bus, it would get me to the station where there is a train waiting right there, and so I would reduce travel time from 50minutes to about 30. Yeah, I don't like wasting time. I'll pretty much always try to keep myself busy. Even if I already am. ( I'm weird =D )
Thursday, April 15, 2010
BEING GAY
A poem called 'BEING GAY,' written by Vivian Smith and Stephen and I.
We are gay and gay,
we lived in rented farts
from day to day
from hand to hand
we knew the gifts that still arise unplanned
we were never mainstream anyway slipknot
we had no background past a dick head
and then the dole and then a pension of a kind
and though things were not right we were not wronged
we learned how not to mind
we never belonged
peripheries at most times were our line
living on the outskirts half the time
or down a lane
my father said, "Don't take it too much
it will affect your ass hole."
our vegetables were grown in backyard lots
my mother grew her flowers in old pots
and trees in kerosene tins near the door
we were what you call the faggot
EDIT: WOW, we are REALLY immature
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
in response to jenn's post...
DAY 24 - WHATEVER TICKLES YOUR FANCY
Best bargain everzzzzzz.
I bought a pair of $120 black Wrangler skinnies for $50.
NOW ONWARDS TO PERMUTATIONS AND COMBINATIONS. Oh 3u maths, you are the bane of my existence.
Was that at Trade Secret?
MY TURN, not only did I totally get three pairs of different Wrangler skinnies for fifty each at Loose Threads, but I got a pair of black Lee stoves for $30. WACHOOOOW!
'Twilight''s Robert Pattinson to play Kurt Cobain in new film?
Twilight's leading man Robert Pattinson is set to play Kurt Cobainin a forthcoming biopic. The Sunreports that the British actor - known as R-Patz to his teen fans - has landed his "dream role" in the part of the Nirvana frontman.
...
i met you at the bloodbank
So I had this dream maybe a few days ago, but I didn't get to blaorg it because I was busy with Ext 2 and whatnot and forgot about it. EHREGOES!!!!!
I'm visiting St Johns Park Public School again, quite probably with Jenn and Courtney but I don't really remember anymore. However, this is irrelevant, because the first thing I can remember is me leaving early and getting in my car and driving (???) to a Maccas Drive-Thru, although the building looked like a Hungry Jacks and just about everything they sold was Hungry Jacks food in Hungry Jacks containers and packaging. Furthermore, the actual ordering of the food operated as a Subway, in that you order something, then you slowly walk (drive) along, and they ask you if you'd like such and such.
Anyway, I order myself a large fries, but when I drive along, they say,
"Large fries, sir?"
to which I reply
"Yes"
to which they give me another large fries - this one considerably bigger than my first, in that my first was how big a large normally looks, and my second was about the size of a football. I realise that they've made a mistake and have given me two shares of food for the price of one, but I don't say anything and see if I can get away with it. As I drive out, a little sign lights up and says
After this, I somehow end up with some skarter boongs, who try to convince me to skate down the hill outside the Valley Plaza near my place. I point out that there are a line of big rocks (the size of footballs) at the bottom of the hill, which they tell me to skate over, because it'll be fine, it'll be like skating through a line of empty plastic bottles, which still doesn't reassure me. To encourage me to do it, they all go first, except that they end up bailing before they get to the rocks. I say okay and start rolling down the hill,
and the next thing I know is I'm at the bottom, past the rocks, with Stephen and Katie, who are saying,
"Man, you were ACTUALLY gonna do it! Fuck." THE END.
hipster riot
American Apparel sale closed in London after scufflesUp to 10 police officers were injured after scuffles broke out when 2,000 people descended on London's Brick Lane for a sale by a US clothing chain. The Met Police said it was called to the American Apparel event, the first day of a planned four-day sale, because of the unexpected turnout. The firm stopped the event, blaming the "dangerous behaviour" of people in the line, but plan to open on Saturday. A police spokesman said three people were arrested on public order offences. He said: "The organisers were unable to ensure the safety of the public and decided to close the event. "Police had not been notified in advance of the numbers expected to attend. The organisers were spoken to by police." He said the 10 police officers had minor injuries. The sale had been advertised on social networking websites with offers of items starting fro m £1 and 85% discounts. Or you could read the full, non-cut down article with a video here. |
7things
So like, I guess I will do this…just keeping up with the trend that smeg tends to set from time to time ^^. My job should be alot easier than Stephens, though I know not how long he took.. I should be able to get this done quicker. Why? Because I’ve started something like this since 2008. Not even joking. Though.. not staying true to myself, I’ve only got 42 entries…for 42 things about myself, that, at the time I would be convinced it was a trait of mine.
On second thought. I wont even be using those…It’ll be even more interesting to see if I have changed in the way I perceive myself over these years. =]
1. I guess the first and foremost thing is that I am very deeply conflicted inside, in terms of how much of myself I want to expose. Things like this, surveys etc.. they always tickle my fancy, because I get the urge to ‘talk’ so to speak…so share memories and moments, fun things and facts. It helps me in an indirect way, when a survey asks me questions about my past. Memories are sacred and special things to me, they’re kind of like some old videos that I still have around the house. Pokemon 2000 - I won it from a drawing competition way back. Things like that? They keep me grounded, so I that I can’t really ever lose my roots of who I am.
2. As you and I may have just realised.. looking up at (1) really does give the indication that I do want to talk about myself hey. But not only that, I feel like I have so much insight to offer if the option of a more engaging conversation were to start up.
3. The most unfortunate thing is that, as modest as I can put this, I think I have a rather diverse range of friends. There was a time around year 9 or 10 where I peaked in trying to make friends and be social and all that. Damn, it was the most tiring objective in the world, and although I don’t regret it, I don’t think I’ve kept as many as I would like.
4. I enviously admire those kids who seem to be bred to be better than you. Everytime I talk to one, I get this small hit of anger and depression inside of me, different realisations, trying to explain my current position. I could be that person. I think to myself. I could offer so much, just like that person. I tend to think to myself.
5. And so I tried being everything. Which is funny, because I used to be something back then. There was this time around last year and year before, where, I thought that I needed to have something to offer. Some form of musical talent, if not academia or sports. Normally it might be hard to set yourself apart from the crowd, but in a school like this, keeping up with the crowd seems to be an achievement in itself. I still think I need to be something worthwhile
6. I don’t know about you, but I live life as if it were some kind of game. Not in the adventurous kind of way, but rather in the sense that, I’ve got some player in the back of my head, always thinking choices over before I act. More clearly put, everything that happens to me becomes some sort of multiple choice. Everything is thought about for a brief moment before carried out. Its as if, sometimes I choose to be nice, as opposed to me just always being nice.
7. In extension of that, I always have this virtual image of myself, living my life. I have some pretty solid and deeply rooted foundations, morals that I maintain above most things. Often at times, I consolidate my actions for that day and think events over, criticise thoughts, words and actions - or lack thereof. In my mind, this makes me a better person, and closer to the one that I actually want to be. Not act out.
8. I realise that I actually really don’t like doing this. hahaahha
facts like this shouldn’t just be put out there in my opinion.. it doesnt really serve a purpose moreso than to pass the time, collect thoughts, or as Stephen has openly mentioned, collect attention.
Thats not to say I don’t like reading these things.. I does offer plenty of insight, and may well be the key to strengthening bonds, correct understandings etc.
I just can’t write stuff like this for people to see xD
ps Stephen, i actually did this yesterday, but forgot to post =X
On second thought. I wont even be using those…It’ll be even more interesting to see if I have changed in the way I perceive myself over these years. =]
1. I guess the first and foremost thing is that I am very deeply conflicted inside, in terms of how much of myself I want to expose. Things like this, surveys etc.. they always tickle my fancy, because I get the urge to ‘talk’ so to speak…so share memories and moments, fun things and facts. It helps me in an indirect way, when a survey asks me questions about my past. Memories are sacred and special things to me, they’re kind of like some old videos that I still have around the house. Pokemon 2000 - I won it from a drawing competition way back. Things like that? They keep me grounded, so I that I can’t really ever lose my roots of who I am.
2. As you and I may have just realised.. looking up at (1) really does give the indication that I do want to talk about myself hey. But not only that, I feel like I have so much insight to offer if the option of a more engaging conversation were to start up.
3. The most unfortunate thing is that, as modest as I can put this, I think I have a rather diverse range of friends. There was a time around year 9 or 10 where I peaked in trying to make friends and be social and all that. Damn, it was the most tiring objective in the world, and although I don’t regret it, I don’t think I’ve kept as many as I would like.
4. I enviously admire those kids who seem to be bred to be better than you. Everytime I talk to one, I get this small hit of anger and depression inside of me, different realisations, trying to explain my current position. I could be that person. I think to myself. I could offer so much, just like that person. I tend to think to myself.
5. And so I tried being everything. Which is funny, because I used to be something back then. There was this time around last year and year before, where, I thought that I needed to have something to offer. Some form of musical talent, if not academia or sports. Normally it might be hard to set yourself apart from the crowd, but in a school like this, keeping up with the crowd seems to be an achievement in itself. I still think I need to be something worthwhile
6. I don’t know about you, but I live life as if it were some kind of game. Not in the adventurous kind of way, but rather in the sense that, I’ve got some player in the back of my head, always thinking choices over before I act. More clearly put, everything that happens to me becomes some sort of multiple choice. Everything is thought about for a brief moment before carried out. Its as if, sometimes I choose to be nice, as opposed to me just always being nice.
7. In extension of that, I always have this virtual image of myself, living my life. I have some pretty solid and deeply rooted foundations, morals that I maintain above most things. Often at times, I consolidate my actions for that day and think events over, criticise thoughts, words and actions - or lack thereof. In my mind, this makes me a better person, and closer to the one that I actually want to be. Not act out.
8. I realise that I actually really don’t like doing this. hahaahha
facts like this shouldn’t just be put out there in my opinion.. it doesnt really serve a purpose moreso than to pass the time, collect thoughts, or as Stephen has openly mentioned, collect attention.
Thats not to say I don’t like reading these things.. I does offer plenty of insight, and may well be the key to strengthening bonds, correct understandings etc.
I just can’t write stuff like this for people to see xD
ps Stephen, i actually did this yesterday, but forgot to post =X
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Criticaltique - GENBEINS SHORT STORY
Well, I've finished it.. and I quite like it.. though I'm not really one to critique since I really suck at English now for some reason. wtflol.
I'll write up something for the first paragraph:
Jane sounds like she is around her late 20s, rather lost in a new world, yet has her (current) priorities sorted. The fact that she ponders on her current case of self, tells us that she is indeed conscious of her problem/disability. It brings about depth to the character, in the way that, Jane is written to be just like one of us, with our own problems wishing to solve them among peers.
..... I dunno, I had something really good and pointful to make when I re-read...but thatshiz came out ^^" sorry.
I'll write up a proper review probs tonight.
IF I CAN BLOODY FINISH PHYSICS/MATHS LOLOLOL.
ENGLISH F@#%^ NEGLECT.
I'll write up something for the first paragraph:
Jane sounds like she is around her late 20s, rather lost in a new world, yet has her (current) priorities sorted. The fact that she ponders on her current case of self, tells us that she is indeed conscious of her problem/disability. It brings about depth to the character, in the way that, Jane is written to be just like one of us, with our own problems wishing to solve them among peers.
..... I dunno, I had something really good and pointful to make when I re-read...but thatshiz came out ^^" sorry.
I'll write up a proper review probs tonight.
IF I CAN BLOODY FINISH PHYSICS/MATHS LOLOLOL.
ENGLISH F@#%^ NEGLECT.
I had a basket for deep fried for breakfast =O
1 - STEPHENS DOING THIS ON TUMBLR and I'm only doing it coz he's doing it. I'm not gay either.
6 - I actually get pissed when I hear stories about everyone getting wasted but I try to tell myself that people should be able to do what they want (within reason).
12 - Whenever the sky looks really nice, I actually would have no problems sitting outside and just staring at it all day except I have shitty work to do
me too fwen =X
also this will sound massively sissy but its prob the only insightful thing that ill post on smeg in awhile:
30 - Sometimes when I'm not sleeping I try to write songs and they all turn out fucking shitty and generic and I get really frustrated
maybe its good to realise a key thing that you've said.
Generic.
Generic as in, mainstream? as in.. stuff that too many people have done? Things we write are actually heavily influenced by our inner desires and motives, rather than our virtual virtues that are usually taken at face value.
Since you always end up writing generic, does it not provide a sense of security, for that you're not the only one who comes up with the stuff? As in.. countless others before you would also feel the same way, wish to convey the same messages.
I could so far as to say "you're not alone" in that regard.. but thats too much sissy. so much, you can't even count... etc hahhaahah
I think I would also like to do the 100 facts/secrets.. but it pretty much goes against something fundamentally me.. and thats to never simply and openly allow the world to directly see who you are.. Maybe because I'm scared that once they see everything that I am.. I'll become boring, and it might reveal to everyone that I'm not so different, and that I'm not really special in any way.
BRUTALLY HONEST? RARGH RAGH ARGH.
....
1/100! WHEEEEEY !
6 - I actually get pissed when I hear stories about everyone getting wasted but I try to tell myself that people should be able to do what they want (within reason).
12 - Whenever the sky looks really nice, I actually would have no problems sitting outside and just staring at it all day except I have shitty work to do
me too fwen =X
also this will sound massively sissy but its prob the only insightful thing that ill post on smeg in awhile:
30 - Sometimes when I'm not sleeping I try to write songs and they all turn out fucking shitty and generic and I get really frustrated
maybe its good to realise a key thing that you've said.
Generic.
Generic as in, mainstream? as in.. stuff that too many people have done? Things we write are actually heavily influenced by our inner desires and motives, rather than our virtual virtues that are usually taken at face value.
Since you always end up writing generic, does it not provide a sense of security, for that you're not the only one who comes up with the stuff? As in.. countless others before you would also feel the same way, wish to convey the same messages.
I could so far as to say "you're not alone" in that regard.. but thats too much sissy. so much, you can't even count... etc hahhaahah
I think I would also like to do the 100 facts/secrets.. but it pretty much goes against something fundamentally me.. and thats to never simply and openly allow the world to directly see who you are.. Maybe because I'm scared that once they see everything that I am.. I'll become boring, and it might reveal to everyone that I'm not so different, and that I'm not really special in any way.
BRUTALLY HONEST? RARGH RAGH ARGH.
....
1/100! WHEEEEEY !
Monday, April 12, 2010
SURE, WHY NOT?
Stephen says:
*TIME TO DO 100 FACTS ABOUT ME
Genvin Out is genvin lol says:
*we play with the soap
*oh how fun
*me too
1 - STEPHENS DOING THIS ON TUMBLR and I'm only doing it coz he's doing it. I'm not gay either.
2 - I'm really, really into Pokemon. I haven't even played any of the new games, but I'm really into Pokemon Online so that should count. I'm trying to fill up with shitty facts as fast as I can.
3 - Sometimes, I actually half-seriously consider, "Am I actually retarded and are all my friends only friends to be nice?"
4 - I have the shittiest shittiest shittiest shit shit shit shit gay music taste in the world.
5 - I believe that I will get the lowest ATAR out of my friends and it is actually true.
6 - I actually get pissed when I hear stories about everyone getting wasted but I try to tell myself that people should be able to do what they want (within reason).
7 - I've been vegaytarian for about four weeks
8 - I actually don't really give a shit about turning eighteen because the only thing I'm really looking forward to is being able to go over eighteens gigs
9 - I'm still not ready.
10 - I am stupid sheep and just follow whatever my friends do
11 - I'm really immature compared to just about everyone else and am hard to talk to
12 - Whenever the sky looks really nice, I actually would have no problems sitting outside and just staring at it all day except I have shitty work to do
13 - I don't blog about very serious things because I am not insightful enough
14 - I very genuinely worry about how I'm going to make friends in uni.
15 - I do a lot of my writing for Extension 2 between midnight and three in the morning, because there are less distractions
16 - Sometimes I think I should just drop Extension 2 because Stephen writes superior short stories but only does Advanced
17 - It might be funny sometimes, but I am so inept at dealing with the most basic situations (calling up a shop and asking directions when we're only one street away, asking for free samples of ice cream, etc) that I actually fear for how the rest of my life is going to turn out
18 - I really wish I was good at art and sometimes I try to draw decent pictures but rip them out of my notebook out of frustration and give up
19 - While I am glad that I dropped to 2 unit math, I am very self conscious because everyone else still does 3-and-4 unit
20 - I am ridiculously scared of major change
21 - I would actually let just about anyone with a pair of scissors cut my hair right now because I don't even really care about it that much anymore. That's not true, I wouldn't settle for a mullet, but nearly anything else, yeah
22 - I don't eat enough and I lost a kilo after going veg
23 - No matter how stupid and shitty it sounds, I am actually pretty proud of my garage punk HSC music composition
24 - I don't have my Ls because truth to be told I don't even really give a shit about public transport and the problems that everyone else seems to have with it and one of the main driving factors behind getting my license would be so that I can drive people around
25 - I actually feel like I owe everyone for putting up with me in Year 7 and 8 and probably 9
26 - I am scared of lots of stuff and among these are ghosts
27 - I am actually forcing myself to slowly become more desensitised to mushrooms
28 - A while back I decided to stop having caffeine, even in the form of Coke or whatever
29 - The other day I stood in the pet food aisle for five extra minutes trying to figure out if the cat food I had bought added up to over $10, because that's all I had on me. When I went to the counter, it turns out it added up to $10.50
30 - Sometimes when I'm not sleeping I try to write songs and they all turn out fucking shitty and generic and I get really frustrated
31 - I've only recently realised that things won't just 'work themselves out in the end' and that I have to actually do something if I want things to go anywhere
32 - I used to try to smile and look actually good in photos but I have since given that up and try to pull really stupid faces so when I look shit it's on purpose
33 - Sometimes when I talk about the world now I feel like I am not in a legitimate position to discuss since I don't do sciences. I wonder how much that will impact my life in future
34 - I don't want to be a journalist and I actually have no idea where the fuck I'm headed
35 - I am ridiculously frightened of electricity and if you give me a shock pen I will inwardly be really upset and freaked out but I'll pretend I'm not and I also really FUCKING hate static shocks
36 - I will actually cry like a sissy on the last day of Year 12 because I will miss the routine of going to school and seeing everyone
37 - I would actually love to adorn my room with art created by everyone I talk to
38 - I very rarely feel happy with how I'm dressed
39 - I actually very much enjoy giving really detailed feedback for people's essays and creative writing
40 - I really understand what people are trying to tell me maybe half the time and I am horrible at picking up on things. 'Half the time' is a bit of an exaggeration, but it's true that I am really, really lost a lot of the time
41 - I actually really enjoy romcoms
42 - I actually really fucking despise celebrity gossip magazines
43 - I really, really wish I could sing
44 - I wish I was really great at photography but I don't want to put in the work required to be so
45 - I don't have a single decent pair of socks, which is half null because I don't really wear socks anymore anyway, but in colder weather like today I'm starting to realise that I rather need them
46 - I am really, really vain. Does this clash with what I said before about not really caring about my hair anymore? It probably does
47 - I couldn't really give a shit about drugs
48 - Despite the fact that I don't care for drugs and alcohol, a lot of the music I listen to is based around partying hard
49 - I got four out of ten for my first Extension 2 English assessment task.
50 - I am actually truly convinced that I will get a really, really horrible mark for my Modern History half yearlies. I'm not even saying this in a "How'd your exam go? Awwwww I did soooo bad" kind of way.
51 - I am genuinely scared that I will lose contact with my friends once uni comes by because I secretly fear that I will not do as well as everyone else no matter how hard I try. Not really a secret
52 - I sometimes genuinely wonder why anyone talks to me, and they probably do too
53 - whoops, who cares, stephen says he's gonna save it for tomorrow morning but i can't be fucked finishing this anyway because i was supposed to continue doing extension 2 work at midnight and its half past midnight right now and i wonder why i continue to neglect my ext 2 work when i did so horribly in my first task and im probably gonna write a really shit short story anyway like that one about the dumb fucking shoe
wow, hasn't this been frighteningly honest?
that MOOD
Does anyone else ever get that mood where you really want to listen to music, but everything in your iTunes (yeah, after all the discussion we had, I still use iTunes) is NOT what you are after? Where you don't particularly feel like any of the artists you normally listen to, and none of the ones you've been checking out recently either?
You might be thinking, but Genvin, why don't you just check out the FIFTEEN ODD GIGABYTES OF NEW MUSIC that Stephen has given you? But alas, I wasn't particularly in the mood for hip new music.
Nor was I in the mood for anything particularly heavy, or dancey. I gave strange ambient/noise type background music a go, like THIS, but it wasn't what I was after either.
I considered generic pop music for about half a second before dismissing it.
Anyway yeah, that mood.
ISN'T IT THE MOST FRUSTRATING FUCKING MOOD IN THE WORLD?
I ended up listening to Sarah Blasko, which turned out to be exactly what I was after.
TO MAKE UP FOR THE LACK OF POSTS
I shall post MANY MANY things now.
Also Quoc, I missed Harvey Norman 10c prints coz I forgot about it, so I didn't end up printing your thanggs.
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