hitting past papers

my angsty blog will consist of:
stuff
and this past week
and month



Firstly, I would like to put out there that the more and more philosophy I read, the more I acknowledge its its lack of practicality in society. It is pretty much like a never ending chess puzzle book. For the thinkers, but really, it still wouldn't help you play it better. It further re-affirms my belief that, philosophy is pretty much the theory behind psychology, but not limited to it.
Secondly, since I am now reading on the philosophy of language, it seems to me that unless you are educated in the right way, it is actually extremely hard to grasp concepts presented by modern/pre-modern philosophers. John Locke and his essays in Human Understanding encapsulates my point exactly. It is not the fact that it was written sometime in the 18th century and that word uses/meanings have changed, but that they are still used in the same way, seemingly disjointed from how we might use it.
Thirdly, I have only two lessons of it left and it occurs to me that I really will miss it alot. Although now, I can have my tuesdays off, which is a plus.

~
On a non related note,
I dislike the notion of saying/texting/messaging "bye" very very much.
I guess it is how one might apply the word in a situation, but to me...no matter the occasion, I don't like it.
Because I always think of the word like a sort of full stop.
Sentences end at fullstops.
I don't like the way "bye" connotes that. That, it is the end of some form of relationship.
Also, I see it as a short half-arsed version of "later" or "see you" for when you're pissed at the person.

"goodbye" however, rings a completely different bell.

~

Massive mood swings this week/month. But now I realise why, and so I suppose it should be smooth sailing from now. It didn't occur to me that it was simply a change of pace. Life is simply a blur now, and as I think of what I did in the past month in terms of HSC preparation...well, honestly nil comes to mind. The first option is not to care and let it run its course. The second is the middle ground of not caring and running myself into the ground. I have to start notes D=<...It always feels like I'm not even interesting at all. I have no idea of what I am gaining from this anymore. Words are seriously meaningless. Like this "conics" question I was doing at tutoring yesterday. It is question 3 of selftesting exercise 6.1. Maybe I was drunk or something but it just didn't click right away. Should it? Took me ages to get the diagram, let alone what it was asking in the first place. Also, questions involving " prove that there are 3 tangents to the ellipse..." and some specific condition. I knew there was more to conics that meets the eye. I feel used. Maybe it takes something big to quench the constant doubting that I find so so terribly hard to ignore. Going to start hitting past papers for subjects. I'm seriously worried that marks will be indifferent to this past year. Oh and,

I love you so much.

When you can't increase the level of happiness in your life, reduce the level of displeasure, so that, in comparison, life isn't so bad after all.